_-¯ Witam. Na początek dwie informacje: zła i dobra. Ta zła jest taka, że pomyliłem się podając kwotę którą potrzeba wpłacić na moje konto, by pobrać $100 tysięcy. Nie wynosi ona $1k, tylko $5k. Jak się o tym dowiedziałem zaraz z oburzeniem napisałem do firmy zajmującej się prawną obsługą spadku, i powiedziałem im co o tym myślę. I teraz dobra informacja: ze względu na to, że mój zmarły... eeee... krewny bardzo długo korzystał z ich usług zgodzili się zniżyć opłatę do 3$k! Zaoszczędziłem dla Was dwa tysiące! Brakujące dwa wpłaćcie tak szybko jak to możliwe, bo jeszcze tamci gotowi się rozmyśleć!

_-¯ A teraz kolejne informacje: jestem coraz bliżej pozyskania $7 milionów za pomoc Pani Lolly Stevens w odzyskaniu pieniędzy jej zmarłego ojca. Napisałem do niej list. Aha - proszę nie komentować mojego angielskiego. Uczę się go dopiero od tygodnia... Albo nie - komentujcie. Łatwiej zapamiętam w których miejscach robię błędy
Hello Ms. Lolly
First of all, please excuse my English. It's not as good as I'd like it to be.
Second, let me offer you my depest condolences on the loss of your father. I'll try to help you and regain your money. I live outside the UK, luckily, but my former girlfriend lives there. Could it be an obstacle?
You wrote about difficulties with clothing - I could contact her and ask her if she could give you some clothes she didn't use. As far as I remember she lives in London, too :)

I think that's all for now.
Greetings
Charyzjusz Chakier

Następnie spróbowałem się skontaktować z adwokatem, ale - głuptasek - źle wpisałem jego adres. Spanikowany napisałem do Pani Lolly kolejny list:
Hello, something's wrong!
I've tried trhee times to contact your lawyer, but I couldn't! My e-mail box first responded with "Error 503: Service unavalaible", and when I managed to send the e-mail after a few tries I received following message in return:

> This is a collection of reports about email delivery
[ cały log serwera ]
> Subject: I'm sent by Lolly Stevens
> Hello
>
> My name is Charyzjusz Chakier. I get in touch with Ms. Lolly Stevens and offered her my help on
> regaining her father's money. She asked me if I could contact you, and here I am :)
>
> How could we get the money from Security company?
>
> Greetings
> Charyzjusz Chakier

Is something wrong with you lawyer's address? Does he have another one I could use?

Please, answer
Charyzjusz Chakier

Na moje ogromne szczęście Pani Lolly skontaktowała się ze swoim adwokatem. Niestety, póki co nie określiła się czy chce nosić używane ubrania po mojej byłej dziewczynie :(
Dostałem list następującej treści:
Hello Charyzjusz,

How are you doing today. You made a mistake with his email adress, his correct email address is markigie@googlemail.com but you got something else. I will inform him to contact you now. I hope you work with him to complete this project very soon, please let me know when you hear from Mr. Igie. Thanks

Lolly Stevens
Skontaktował się również ze mną Pan Barrister Markson Igie. I wiecie co? On wcale nie ma na pierwsze imię "Barrister" ;)
From : The Principal Attorney
Markson & Co (Legal Practitioners).
4 allen way avenue, Victoria Island, London. England

Attn. Sir,

Good day, My name is Barrister Markson Igie, I was the attorney to Mr. Chico Stevens before he died, that is Ms. Lolly Stevens father.

I am so glad that you are willing to help this family and I want you to know that there is no RISK involved in this and it is LEGAL. We contacted the security company in Holland which the funds were deposited by Mr. Chico Stevens, in order to claim the funds but they refused our claim because they needed us to provide a foreign benefiary who will assist us with the claim.

They requested this because Mr. Chico Stevens was murdered by some group of people and they might be trying to claim his funds too, so because of security reasons they refused anyone within UK even the family. But the family can provide somebody outside UK to help them. Thsi was a big problem because the family do not have any relations outside UK but I told Ms. Stevens to seek for help till she found you.

I will need you to please send me your personal informations again, I will need your:
Full Name
Address
Phone Number
Fax Number (If Any)

I will need this before I can give you the security company informations because this will show me that you are really serious and ready to help this family. A copy of this will also be forwarded to the Security Company in Holland too before you contact them so that they will know that we have accepted you as the beneficiary to Mr. Chico Stevens funds.

Here is my personal informations below:
Full Name: Barrister Markson Igie.
Office Address: 4 allen way avenue, Victoria Island, London. England
Telephone: +447031742579
Email: Marksonigie@googlemail.com

Please let me know if you need any other information about me.Please Call me as soon as you get this if you can or email me back. Always write Lolly she is so nice let her know what you have in mind okay? Thank you.

Best Regards,
Barrister Markson Igie. B, B.L,
Markson & Co (Legal Practitioners).
4 allen way avenue, Victoria Island, London. England
Oczywiście odpisałem prędziutko. Kolejny krok na drodze do fortuny!